The Last Ounce of Courage Opens This Weekend

by Doug Phillips at Vision Forum

Some very dear friends have labored long and hard to put a film in the theaters this weekend which they hope will encourage many to stand against the tide of indifference in the face of the Marxism and anti-Christian bigotry which is redefining the public square. The film which features many home educators is called “The Last Ounce of Courage” will be opening on more than a thousand screens this weekend. I intend on taking my own family and want to encourage you to do the same. Here is a write-up I received on the film which I am sharing with you:

”...It is a heart warming Christian movie that your whole family can enjoy. All of the lead actors are Christians and Jennifer O’Neill is also a well known speaker at pro-life events. What we did not know until today is that this movie was produced and promoted primarily by home school dads from Texas and Oklahoma. In addition, two of the young lead actors have home schooled. This is a great opportunity to support God-honoring entertainment. Last Ounce of Courage is enthusiastically backed and endorsed by Dr. James Dobson, AFA, Brad Bright (Campus Crusade for Christ), Chuck Norris (only movie ever to get his seal of approval), etc....Please know that a strong opening weekend is VITAL to ensure that the movie and its message will continue in the theaters. You might also utilize email and/or social media communication to your friends and family and workplace. Consider purchasing tickets as a gift for a group, i.e. military families, soldiers, veterans, church groups, schools, family, friends, etc. To purchase tickets for September 14th, 15th or 16th and to find theaters in your area go to: http://www.standusa.com/last-ounce-of-courage/ Please see Last Ounce of Courage this weekend!!!”

 

On the Presidential Endorsement of Same-Sex Marriage

 For two decades the frog has been in the pot while the temperature has been slowly turned up. Yesterday, it was finally cooked and served to the American people in a sauce so thick as to cover the rancid flavor of the dish.

The process began with the Bush presidencies and their toleration for homosexuality. It was advanced in full by the Clinton Administration. It has now reached its logical zenith under Obama. So we should not be surprised by the official announcement that the President of the United States of America has finally declared to the world his opposition to the historical, common law and biblical meaning of marriage. President Obama may be remembered for many things, but few are as fundamental in its treason to his countrymen, to his oath of office and to the living God, then his decision to use the presidency to redefine a definition of marriage that was established on Day Six of Creation and has been the benchmark of civilization for 6,000 years.

Mark your calendars—May 9, 2012, the President of the United States of America finally crossed a line from which there is no return without repudiation and repentance. Terrorists are dangerous. The economy is a real and present danger. But there is simply nothing other then the holocaust of the unborn which imperils the safety of our country or places our people in jeopardy as does the leader of the Western world publicly raising his fist at the Heavens and declaring that the bedrock institution of society, ordained of God and meant to be protected by the state, is little more than a convention of convenience for the children of Sodom to transform the meaning of something which is precious to Jesus Christ and a living picture of His love for the Church, into a legally protected justification for perversion, and vehicle of hatred aimed directly at that love.

Doug Phillips, President Vision Forum Ministries

 

Education Choices are Not Neutral: The Implications of Islamic Madrasahs and Government Schools for Our Christian Children

Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. But his delight is in the law of the LORD; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. Psalm 1: 1-2

"Sending our children to be discipled for 24,000 hours of their lives in academic temples of false gods is inconsistent with what the Bible says about the training of children. In the Bible, parents are positively commanded to teach their children to love and fear God (Deuteronomy 4:9; 6:4-7; Ephesians 6:4), and to grow in the knowledge of His Word and its applications to all of life (Joshua 1:8; 2 Peter 3:18) through a daily, walk-beside, morning-to-evening method of discipleship (Deuteronomy 6:4-9) which is drenched in the love of Jesus Christ (Colossians 2:1-3). They are also warned of the dangers of deceptive teachers (Psalm 144:11-13; Colossians 2:8; I Timothy 6:3-5, 20-21), dangerous influences (I Corinthians 15:33; Proverbs 13:20, 2 Peter 3:17), and false religions (2 Peter 2:1-2; Jude 3-4). They are reminded that you can not have true education without the fear of the Lord, because knowledge begins with the fear of God (Proverbs 9:10; Psalm 111:10). They are even reminded that those who reject Christ as the foundation of knowledge are fools (Psalm 14:1). It is therefore proper to ask—why would I want to hand my children over for their daily discipleship to peers and foolish teachers? Why would I want to require my children to daily sit in the classroom desks of the scorners when God tells me that such people will not be blessed (Psalm 1:1-3)?"

To read this entire article by Doug Phillips, go to the Vision Forum blog.

A Christian Response to Earth Day

by Doug Phillips of Vision Forum

For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse. (Romans 1:20)
A Christian Response to Earth Day

All men are religious because all men have an object of worship. All men have faith in something. In the end, men will either worship and serve the creature, or they will worship and serve the Creator. But they will worship something.

In the 18th century, many began to worship the mind. The religion of that day was rationalism. In the 19th century, this god morphed into scientism. But science failed to provide the answers to ultimate questions. The men of the 20th century looked for a more immediate solution to the problems of humanity — they chose to worship the State. This failed. Statism proved to be a harsh taskmaster. In the absence of any real solutions from rationalism, scientism, and statism, men fixed their attention on a new god — or rather, an ancient God that just needed a new facelift.

That god is the earth.

21st-century men are earth worshippers. They are sanitized pantheists. Of course, they don’t call themselves pantheists or earth worshippers, but religious devotion to the material world is the essence of this modern faith.

This religious devotion to the material world as god comes in many shapes and sizes, but it has become ubiquitous in our culture. The new pantheism is at the heart of the green movement. It is reflected in the priorities of Hollywood, in the agenda of politicians, and in the curriculums of the government schools. It is found in the marketing campaign of Madison Avenue, in the reality TV shows of cable television, and sadly, even in pulpits across the nation. The worship of the creation has become a defining undercurrent in our culture, even as it is reshaping many of the cultures of the modern world.

And this is one reason why this Friday, April 22, millions of people (perhaps billions) representing the countries of the United Nations will stop to celebrate the high holy day of this religion as they pay homage to the earth God. Of Earth Day, evolutionary anthropologist Margaret Meade once explained that:


EARTH DAY is the first holy day which transcends all national borders, yet preserves all geographical integrities, spans mountains and oceans and time belts, and yet brings people all over the world into one resonating accord, is devoted to the preservation of the harmony in nature and yet draws upon the triumphs of technology, the measurement of time, and instantaneous communication through space. EARTH DAY draws on astronomical phenomena in a new way — which is also the most ancient way — by using the vernal Equinox, the time when the Sun crosses the equator making the length of night and day equal in all parts of the earth. To this point in the annual calendar, EARTH DAY attaches no local or divisive set of symbols, no statement of the truth or superiority of one way of life over another.

Should Christians care about the earth? Not only must we care about it, we have a holy duty to engage the earth. The difference between the objectives of biblical Christianity and radical environmentalism can be found in the religious assumptions of both groups.

Four Lies of the Radical Environmentalist Movement

With Earth Day comes billions of dollars worth of environmentalist propaganda driven by their religious worldview. Some of the themes you can expect to hear repeated this year include the following:

1. The Earth Is Our Mother: The very expression “Mother Earth” is popular parlance in our culture and reflects the old pagan longing to worship the physical world. Modern environmentalists, with their devotion to the idea that man is just another life-form to spring from the womb of the earth on the evolutionary journey of life, speak openly about earth being the mother of man.

2. Human Life Has No Greater Intrinsic Value Than Animal Life: The notion that man is an insignificant blip in the universe and that our planet is almost as insignificant as man is an oft-repeated concept of the modern environmentalist movement. Radical environmentalists complain about the carbon footprints of humans, and the sin of “Speciesism” — man discriminating against lower life-forms.

3. The Greatest Crisis Facing Humans is the Despoiling of the Earth: From the media campaigns of former Vice President Al Gore, to the film agenda of Avatar, radical environmentalists want you to believe that the single greatest problem facing humanity is the environmental destruction of earth.

4. Absent a Radical Shift in Private Practice and Public Policy, the Environmental Crisis Will Lead to the End of Life on Earth: Modern pantheists care deeply about the future. One thing is clear: Radical envioronmentalists have their own eschatology. They see the end of the world coming because of nuclear waste, global warming, the loss of rainforest in the Amazon, or any of a host of perceived environmental hazards.

Four Christian Assumptions About the Earth
1. The Earth is Witness to the Power and Authority of God the Creator Who Alone May Be Worshipped: The Bible teaches that the very existence of the earth is a reminder to all men of the eternal power and Godhood of Christ, so that they are without excuse (Romans 1:20). It reminds us that as long as the earth continues, the promises of God will remain faithful (Genesis 8:22; Deuteronomy 7:9). Significantly, the Bible warns us that the consequence for man rejecting the witness of creation is that he worships creation itself (Romans 1:22-25).

2. The Earth Was Made for the Glory of God and the Benefit of Man Who Was Made the Pinnacle of Creation and of Infinitely Greater Value than Animals or the Earth Itself: Man is the pinnacle of creation and has more eternal value than the earth or any of the creatures who live on it (Psalm 8:5). Man is not a carbon footprint; he is the image-bearer of God. This means that the most “insignificant” human life (insignificant only in the eyes of man) is of inestimably greater value than that of a blue whale, a snail darter, a spotted owl, a mountain, or a tree.

3. The Earth Has Been Placed under Man who Has a Moral Obligation to Subdue it and to Exercise Wise Stewardship over the Earth: Man is God’s appointed steward on earth, and his core mission is to be His agent of dominion over it. Toward this end, God has placed all things under man to be used for his benefit and to be carefully stewarded and cultivated for God’s glory. “Thou madest him to have dominion over the works of thy hands; thou hast put all things under his feet” (Psalm 8:6).

4. The Earth is Not the Problem: The reason why the earth suffers is because of man’s sin that has plunged the earth into judgment. Man brought death and judgment to earth. In fact, the whole creation is groaning and waiting redemption (Romans 8:22-23). Despite the righteous judgment of God on earth, He is merciful and promises the continuation of the seasons and the fundamental stability of the planet until the end of time (Genesis 8:22), at which there will be a new heaven and new earth (2 Peter 3:13).

Conclusion

All men are religious because all men have an object of worship. In the end, they will worship and serve the creature, or they will worship and serve the Creator. But they will worship something.

Earth Day, and the radical environmental movement that spawned this high holy day of pantheism, are at war with the Gospel because they perpetuate false worship. The Christian response to the idolatry of Earth Day might be reduced to this simple thought: Jesus Christ is the Creator, and He alone is to be worshipped. He created man as the pinnacle of creation and determined that humans would be the only part of creation to be made in the very image of God, and that man as the image-bearer of God would rule over the earth.

On a practical level, this means that Christians need to stop allowing the radical environmentalist movement to define the issue. We must cease from being the tail and become the head on the question of our duties, privileges, and responsibilities vis-a-vis creation. The Bible has a great deal to say about our use of the resources of the world and our relationship to the earth. Of all people, Christians who honor the Creator should have a passion for creation. We are losing the debate through subversion, silence, lack of vision, and because of the Christian community’s fear of the God-ordained, perpetually valid, creation precept called “The Dominion Mandate.” This mandate directs man is to rule over the earth, subduing it and taking dominion over it for his benefit and for God’s glory. Implicit to the Dominion Mandate is the duty of man to cultivate, wisely manage, and carefully steward the planet.

Finally, man’s problems will never be solved through the elevation of human reason, the power of science, or the interventions of the state. Nor will rescuing the biosphere of planet earth save man or ensure him a future on this planet. You cannot save the earth. But human beings can be saved. And the only hope of salvation is found in Jesus Christ — the Creator! It is this Creator through whom we live and breathe and who by the very power of His word holds the worlds together. He will someday establish a new heaven and a new earth and will bring all of His people into Glory.

Women in Combat...it is finally here!

"The civil law, as well as nature herself, has always recognized a wide difference in the respective spheres and destinies of man and woman. Man is, or should be, woman’s protector and defender. (Bradwell v. Illinois, U.S. Supreme Court, 1873)
The Air Force Times, in reporting on the story, explained:
The Defense Department should eliminate restrictions on women serving in combat units and end all ‘gender restrictive policies,’ according to a blue-ribbon panel created by Congress. The move would end the military’s long tradition of all-male combat units and open up career fields like infantry and armor to ‘qualified women.’ . . .

What is being proposed by the Military Leadership Diversity Commission is reprehensible to God’s moral order. It is horrendous, and it must be opposed."

To read this entire article by Doug Phillips, go to Vision Forum.

The Five Scariest Things You Can Do This Halloween

The fear of the Lord is to hate evil. (Proverbs 8:13)

By Doug Phillips

Our country is in the grip of a fear crisis. The tension because of this fear is almost palpable. There is fear over elections, fear over the economy, and fear over hundreds of other issues ranging from the environment to terrorism.

The one fear that America is missing is a fear of the Lord. As a people, we no longer fear God. Because we do not fear God, we no longer hate evil (Proverbs 8:13).

Instead of hating evil, Americans toy with it. We toy with holidays like Halloween that were conceived in evil and that promote the “cute-ification” of evil, whether that evil takes the form of witchcraft, sorcery, ghoulishness, or some other form of malevolent imagery paraded before our children. We laugh at the very things that the Lord describes as “abominations,” and we find ourselves obsessively fascinated by, and attracted to, all things dark.

Yet we do not fear the Lord.

Those who “hate evil” are very scary to a secular society that fears man more than God. They are scary because they dare to declare that there are absolute standards by which society must be governed. They are scary because, if they are successful, industries like Hollywood that make billions of dollars by promoting ungodly fear will lose their influence. They are scary because such people will not be swayed by political candidates who use fear as a tool for manipulation.

With this in mind, I offer you the five “scariest” things you can do this Halloween:

1. The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to not make light of evil. Halloween was conceived in evil and has remained a celebration that uses children to promote a fascination with darkness and superstitious fear. Simultaneously, it makes light of things that the Bible describes as evil. Stand against such things, and the world will find you very scary indeed. The fear of the Lord makes men turn from evil (Proverbs 16:6).
2. The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to not be fearful. The media wants you to be afraid of everything from overpopulation to global warming. The politicians want you to be afraid of the economy and political instability. God wants you to do what is morally right, trust Him completely, and never be gripped by an ungodly spirit of fear. You can place your trust and hope for this nation in the King of Kings. Jesus said: “And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do. But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him” (Luke 12:4-5). Believe this, and you will be light to the world.
3. The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to completely skip Halloween and remember Reformation Day. It was 493 years ago that Martin Luther nailed his world-changing 95 Theses to the door of the Wittenberg church. These theses included rebukes to ungodly fear and superstition. 501 years ago, sometime near October 31, a baby named John Calvin was conceived who would dedicate his life to eradicating an ungodly fear of superstitious beliefs and proclaiming the gospel of grace. His emphasis on reformation, revival, and the sufficiency of Scripture had such far-reaching implications for nations like the United States that he has been described by Christian and secular scholars alike as the true founding father of America. The Reformers did something that was very scary to the world of their day. They stood against all forms of dark superstitions which grip the minds and souls of men. It was their emphasis on the fear of the Lord and the wisdom of Holy Scripture that was used by God to liberate untold numbers of men and women. But to remember the Reformers instead of Halloween is very scary to the world. “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (Proverbs 9:10).
4. The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to refuse to watch or allow your children to watch any of the toxic Halloween and horror films emerging from Hollywood. America’s fascination with ungodly fear has made horror the most popular and fastest-growing film genre among youth. When parents allow their children to toy with this genre, they promote ungodly fear, and they contribute to the fear-factories in Hollywood that prey upon the youth of our culture. Say “no” to Hollywood horror and you will be dangerously scary to the media elite. “Fear ye not me? saith the Lord: will ye not tremble at my presence....?” (Jeremiah 5:22).
5. The scariest thing you can do this Halloween is to get on your knees as a mother and father and pray that the Lord will send you many, children who will fear God, not man — children who will especially shun the glorification of witchcraft, the bondage of ungodly fear, and the “cute-ification” of evil that is promoted through holidays like Halloween. Cultures that toy with evil end up being cultures of death. The Christian response is to be a people of life. That means babies. It means fearing God by honoring His command to “be fruitful and multiply.” It means remembering that the Scripture describes children as a “blessing” and a “reward.” Raise children that fear God more than man, and that will be answer enough to our Halloween- and darkness-obsessed culture; for if you trust God over your womb and commit your children to a holy education, you will be very scary to the modern world. “Come, my children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the Lord” (Psalm 34:11).

The Cost of Motherhood

from Doug's Blog

Once a lady went to visit her friend. During the visit the children of the friend entered the room and began to play with each other. As the lady and her friend visited, the lady turned to her friend and said eagerly and yet with evidently no thought of the meaning of her words: “Oh, I’d give my life to have such children.” The mother replied with a subdued earnestness whose quiet told of the depth of experience out of which her words came: “That’s exactly what it costs.”

There is a cost of motherhood. And the price is no small sum. And if you are not willing to pay this price, no amount of encouragement about the joys of motherhood will satisfy. But the price of motherhood is not fundamentally different from the price of being a disciple of Jesus Christ. In fact, Christian mothers see their duty as mothers flowing from their calling to Jesus Christ. And what is this cost?
Christian motherhood means dedicating your entire life in service of others. It means standing beside your husband, following him, and investing in the lives of children whom you hope will both survive you and surpass you. It means forgoing present satisfaction for eternal rewards. It means investing in the lives of others who may never fully appreciate your sacrifice or comprehend the depth of your love. And it means doing all these things, not because you will receive the praise of man — for you will not — but because God made you to be a woman and a mother, and there is great contentment in that biblical calling.
In other words, Motherhood requires vision. It requires living by faith and not by sight.
These are some of the reasons why Motherhood is both the most biblically noble and the most socially unappreciated role to which a young woman can aspire. There are many people who ask the question: Does my life matter? But a mother that fears the Lord need never ask such a question. Upon her faithful obedience hinges the future of the church and the hope of the nation.
In 1950, the great Scottish American preacher Peter Marshall stood before the United States Senate and he explained it this way:

The modern challenge to motherhood is the eternal challenge — that of being a godly woman. The very phrase sounds strange in our ears. We never hear it now. We hear about every other kind of women — beautiful women, smart women, sophisticated women, career woman, talented women, divorced women, but so seldom do we hear of a godly woman — or of a godly man either, for that matter.
I believe women come nearer fulfilling their God-given function in the home than anywhere else. It is a much nobler thing to be a good wife than to be Miss America. It is a greater achievement to establish a Christian home than it is to produce a second-rate novel filled with filth. It is a far, far better thing in the realm of morals to be old-fashioned than to be ultramodern. The world has enough women who know how to hold their cocktails, who have lost all their illusions and their faith. The world has enough women who know how to be smart.
It needs women who are willing to be simple. The world has enough women who know how to be brilliant. It needs some who will be brave. The world has enough women who are popular. It needs more who are pure. We need women, and men, too, who would rather be morally right that socially correct.

As we approach America’s national Mother’s Day celebration, lets remember that we are fighting for the Lord, and it is He who prioritizes motherhood and home as the highest calling and domain of womanhood “that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Titus 2:5. May the Lord fill our churches with faithful mothers!

What Does It Mean to Be a Man?

I found a wonderful quote of what it means to be a man in Doug Phillips' book, "The Little boy Down the Road". It is found in the chapter entitled, "The Rise and Fall and Rise of Motherhood in America" on page 160.

"To be a man, you must care about women, and you must care about them in the right way. You must care about them as being worthy of protection, honor, and love. This means genuinely appreciating them for their uniqueness as women. It means recognizing the preciousness of femininity over glamour, of homemaking over careerism, and of mature motherhood over perpetual youth. But when women are reduced to soldiers, sexual objects, and social competitors, it is not merely the women who lose the identity given to them by the Creator, but the men as well. This si why the attack on motherhood has produced a nation of eunuchs---socially and spiritually impotent men who have little capacity to lead, let alone love women as God intended man to love woman--as mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters."

Haitian Orphans

The conditions that the Haitian orphans are enduring are horrendous. Go to Doug Phillips' blog for more details.

Dockers Ad...Who Wears the Pants!

I found this over at Doug Phillips' blog and had to share it with my readers too. This is great! Dockers is hearkening back to the "Good 'ole Days".

(My Friend, Jennifer did some research and found an article pertaining to this ad.)
***As an addendum to this post, I want to include an excerpt from an article by Elaine Wong, December 1, 2009. She is interviewing a representative of Levi Strauss, the maker of Docker on why they've put out this new, "Wear the pants" campaign. There's a lot here:

"We started to do some research. In today's world, men have lost a bit of footing, in part because women have come so far, but we also found a few surprising facts: Eighty-percent of those who suffered unemployment in the last year were men. Women outnumber men in the workforce now. But the most surprising fact of all was that men's testosterone levels have been dropping by a percentage point a year for 20 years."

Is Pregnancy Tantamount to Slavery?

"... (Dawn) Johnsen said that any restriction that makes abortion less accessible is, in her view, tantamount to “involuntary servitude” because it “requires a woman to provide continuous physical service to the fetus in order to further the state’s asserted interest [in the life of the unborn].”
In effect, a woman “is constantly aware for nine months that her body is not her own: the state has conscripted her body for its own ends.” Such “forced pregnancy,” she contends, violates the Thirteenth Amendment, which prohibits slavery."
For the rest of this article go to Doug Phillip's blog.

12 Things You Should Not Do To Your Husband

(I read this on Doug Philip's blog for August 22nd, 2008)

Gracious ladies, enter here. Vicious man-haters, beware. Camilia Brown is in the house, and her words are health to the homemaker, but hateful to the rapacious feminist. Camilla is part of the league of gracious, responsible lady bloggers, and the following is from an article entitled “12 Things You Should Not Do To Your Husband.” Read at your own risk:

DO NOT treat your husband as one of your children. You are not running the household he is. So no matter how busy you think you are or how many tasks you might have to perform at once you should not address your husband in this way: “Honey come here! Do this! Hold that! Grab this! Deal with this or that!”. Now I am all for asking our husbands for help when he is available to give it, but bossing him around is not becoming to a wife. We must conduct ourselves as his help meet and not treat him as if the reverse were true.

DO NOT act as if you are more spiritual than he is. I honestly have a hard time with women who act as if they are the spiritual leaders of their family; as if they are doing all the spiritual reformation in the family while their husbands are busy with other pursuits and just tag along with regard to spiritual matters. We’ve all heard women say things like: ” Well God told me this is the best for our family so I had to take the decision, because my husband is not there yet... I am praying for him though!” Even if it were true that a woman might be more spiritual than her husband, this attitude is a usurpation of the authority that God has given the family. There is never room for this kind of behavior in a Christian home. Honestly, my thoughts are that women who set themselves up as spiritual gurus in the family and brag of being more spiritual or knowledgeable than anyone else have proved themselves to be the contrary.

DO NOT talk over him and in a gathering DO NOT talk more than he does. If he doesn’t talk much than talk even less. It is just not becoming to women to do all the talking as if they speak for the family.

DO NOT complain about him to others. Don’t make him look foolish in front of anyone and don’t talk about his weaknesses to anyone.

DO NOT compare him with other men. You married an individual with different qualities, different style and vision. He is not like anyone else. He is the man that God has given you the task of loving and serving, and you should consider it an honor to be able to carry out that duty. Note to unmarried ladies: Make a list with the qualities a future husband MUST have to avoid your being totally dissatisfied. If it was not that important before you got married don’t nag him or be dissatisfied about it after you get married.

DO NOT nag him continuously about a matter. Did you hear the expression? DRIP! DRIP! DRIP!? I don’t like it when the children come even close to being drips, so I am sure no husband would appreciate it either.

DO NOT make him feel he doesn’t measure up to your expectations. Encourage, don’t criticize and most important...be content!

DO NOT be afraid to bring to his attention sins that he should deal with or concerns that you might have in regard to his conduct. It is a wife’s duty to encourage her husband in his spiritual growth. While it is not the wife’s duty to assume the role of her husbands conscience, she is the closest to him and can encourage him grow in ways that others cannot. Our husbands must trust that we are help meets to them and that we are honest and sober minded in our reproof.

DO NOT always speak your mind. This doesn’t mean we should not have an opinion, but most of the time it is better to hold our tongues rather than “state the facts”. Choose your words carefully in soberness, patience, and love. This does not mean that it is wrong to be open with your husband about your concerns or being honest when he asks our opinion. There is a greater respect and trust that your husband will show toward your opinion when you find this balance.

DO NOT seek out parallel lives with him. Become acquainted with whatever job he does and get involved if possible; even if by just listening to him talk about it. Don’t think about your husband’s pursuits in terms of: HIS career, HIS hobbies, HIS this or HIS that. I hear women say: “well he is busy with his pursuits and I with the children”. Yes we have different roles but we work together towards the same goal: to Glorify God in every area of our lives. You can’t be a proper help meet for your husband if you are not involved in everything he is doing whether you are interested or not.

DO NOT become too busy to listen to him or do things for him. When you start to have lots of children it can become really easy to do this, but remember you are made to be a help meet for him.

DO NOT let your appearance go because you have married him now. Make yourself pretty for him. Yes he loves you no matter what, but you made sure that you showed him that you care enough to look nice for him before you were married, you should care more, not less, after he actually becomes your husband. It is not a matter of keeping his affections, but rather continuing to give him all that we have to offer. 5 minutes a day is all it takes.

I have made my share of mistakes and still do. Many of them are listed above. I am still a work in progress, so please don’t take this to mean that I think I have arrived. I thought listing a few resolutions and observations, may be helpful to someone else.

Thank you, Camilia, for your courage and bold insights.

Posted by Doug Phillips on August 22, 2008 Permalink